JPod, Part the First

First reaction after reading Part 1 of this book: OMG. This. Book. Is. Amazing.

It's possibly the most random, most randomly hilarious book I have ever read. I'll let the words speak for themselves. Below are some excerpts.


"The only way to the top is killing and greed. Okay, I'm kidding. But killing helps. Greed kind of helps, but it looks ugly, and at parties people avoid greedheads, so there goes your social life."


"Don broke his arm skiing in February, but six weeks in a splint and he's tickety-boo. Laurie got her accreditation and is now a fully qualified dental hygienist. Mark brought shame upon the family after he signed up for the local community college's Clown Program. He says the program will put him into the clown fast track, but he's now dead to us."


"'I was in a fourgy with these three BMX chicks I met last weekend, and it was a dream come true, and then this one chick puts on a Raggedy Ann wig and a red foam nose, and says, Look at me, I'm Ronald McDonald, and I freaked.'"


Based on these quotes, it's kind of hard to tell what the book's about, but it's a satire novel about six cubicle workers with last names beginning with J (hence the title) who are "bureaucratically marooned in jPod, a no-escape architectural limbo on the fringes of a massive Vancouver game design company." These workers, each extremely abnormal in his or her own way, do anything except get serious work done. For example, they each write letters to Ronald McDonald asking him to choose them for his mate.

The most awesome part of the book is Ethan Jarlewski's (the main character's) mom. Ethan's mom is a pot grower who seems hilariously amoral. When a biker figures out her marijuana operation, she kills him by electrocuting him. She also collects some overdue marijuana money from another biker by shooting his foot. She does this all in a sugary sweet manner reminiscent of other normal moms. The contrast is so great that you wonder if she has split personalities.

I think it'd be great to have a mom like that, minus the killing aspect.